Rebuttal: 10 Women Christian Men Should Not Marry

BEWARE THE VAGINA!!

For many people, finding the right person to settle down with is a very important life goal. That special someone who is not too hot, not too cold, not too hard, not to soft; in essence just right. This is not an easy task to accomplish and many of us will turn to the endless wisdom of the Internet for advice. If you did such a search on the 29th of December of last year, you may have come across an article on nycpastor.com, with the same title as this entry (minus the ‘rebuttal’ part of course). Within this article, the author tried to use biblical scripture to aid men in finding the most appropriate ‘Christian women’ to marry. I used quote marks there as his idea what it means to be a Christian will differ from billions of others who identify with the same title. Anyway, as I read through the ten points, I became more and more disturbed and rather upset with what was being touted as ‘the ideal’. The underlying tones portrayed were ones that are very much going against the advancements that we have made as a society, in terms of equality and women’s ability to express their sexuality. Today we will be looking at each point, dissecting it to find their roots and will discuss the positives and negatives of each. Spoiler alert, the positives are few and far between.

While I would rather not insult your intelligence Reader, I feel that a short disclaimer is needed. This is not an entry disputing the validity of believing in the Christian god Yahweh, nor is it talking about the historical reliability of the Bible. This is simply looking at the points raised in the article in question and satirising them to highlight the issues that arise within them. This is less an article against religion; rather an article that is against a man using the Bible to push is own political agenda.

Let’s begin.

  • The Unbeliever: Christian men, don’t you dare enter a relationship with a woman who has a differing worldview. Ensure that your ideologies and perceptions of reality are kept in your bubble, by being with a carbon copy person of yourself. Keep away from any chance of you ever having your mind expanded, beliefs challenged and learning something new from someone who has their own individual ideas.
  • The Divorcee: Christian men, keep away from tainted women who have broken the sanctity of marriage. She has ended an obviously unfulfilling and unmanageable relationship with another person and it’s not up to you to provide the love and affection that was lacking to her previously. Allow her to learn from the mistake she made in getting married to her previous partner and be damned if you ever enter anything with her that will allow her to put that valuable experience into practice.
  • The Older Woman: Christian men, if you ever meet a woman who is your senior, run a mile!! Her age means that she is well past her prime and cannot offer you anything apart from a freedom pass on the bus, easy parking and denture advice. An experienced and worldly wise woman who is older then you in any capacity simply cannot keep up with the vitality of the younger, raw and socially naïve man and will not be able to any way shape or form impart any of her knowledge to you. Also did you see the research that is out to show correlation between being with an older woman and dying sooner?! We all know a correlation mean fact, just like the link between people drowning in pools and the number of Nicholas Cage films. http://www.tylervigen.com/
  • The Feminist: Christian men, if the woman that you’re thinking of proposing to believes that she is equal to you, refrain from getting onto that knee. She is forgetting that you have a penis, so you automatically trump her vagina. Forget that she did better then you in her GCSEs, can drink you under the table and makes more money then you do. She should listen to you without question, as you one of the lucky ones to be born with all of your genitalia dangling between your legs. Also don’t forget one of the first lessons you were taught in school, that girls are smelly and are too dumb to know how to properly play Power Rangers at lunch break. This lesson obviously translated to adulthood in every way imaginable and isn’t in the slightest bit juvenile.
  • The Immodest Dresser: Christian men, your woman should cover up and never express her sexuality through the wearing of clothing that she chooses and feels comfortable in. The second that she does, she is a dirty slut and will attract the attention of other men, meaning they will be lusting to touch your belongings, sorry I mean your wife. As a man you are obviously free to wear what you want, because as we all know that women are not turned on at all by the male form. Yet other men cannot control themselves and may want what you have. Make sure your wife is covered!!
  • The Gossiper/Slanderer: Christian men, nag nag nag nag nag nag nag nag nag nag nag. Am I right? A woman who discusses her hopes and dreams with a close and personal friend is not one to be trusted. She might be talking about you in a negative light, which goes against our previous points of you being in control of her. Ok you many not be attentive to her, might forget her birthday every year and come home drunk more often then not, but her confiding in said close, personal friend for comfort, reassurance and advice on how she can make it better, is blatant slander and is not becoming of a good wife.
  • The Childbirth Avoider: Christian men, you all want children. That’s obvious!! Every man in the world wants to be a father, yet there are women out there who laugh in the face of this. Yes it is her body and yes she has the final say, but it’s only 9 whole months of their lives that they have the baby inside them and there is some morning sickness, emotional episodes, mood swings, searing back pain, having an overactive bladder, stretch marks, swelling that may never go down, hideously painful contractions and possible tearing in childbirth, but so what? As a man you don’t have to worry about any of this, as she is the one going through it all.
  • The Wander-Luster: Christian men, just like the gossiper that we mentioned before, an independent and socially active women is not one that you should settle down with. If she is out all the time, who’s going to be there to look after you, as we know that you can’t do it? Damn a woman who has a great social life and strong group of friends that act like family. Damn her to ‘h’ ‘e’ two hockey sticks!!
  • The Career-First Women: Christian men, now I’m not saying that a working women is bad (am I not merciful), but a women that puts her job ahead of her wifely duties, then she needs to be given the boot. It doesn’t matter if her field is very competitive so needs to work very hard, that she gets a great sense of fulfilment from succeeding or will be able to better support any family that she makes in a few years after obtaining a more lucrative job role, she should ensure that she completes a days work and is home in time to fix up your supper. If she is out working for a living instead of cooking your dinner, you’ll starve to death!! Does she not care?!

Well there they are, all of the points raised by the author on the ten women that Christian men should avoid. Yes there are only nine above, but the tenth was ‘the devotion-less woman’, as in a woman who has not given herself up to god. As I said at the top of this entry, I was not going at the religious beliefs, rather the actual ideas themselves and satirising that tenth point would be me simply going at him for holding a religious belief. On a side note in the near future ‘religion’ is a topic that will be tackled in its own entry, but only when I have ensured that it has been worded perfectly.

All in all, the points that we have seen today Reader all point to one thing, demonising women and setting up ridiculous expectations for them to fulfil. Simply put, they are baby factories that should keep quiet and not ever believe that they are equal to men. I don’t know about you Reader, but I don’t particularly want to revert back to the dark ages. On the other side, these ideas will also add a great deal of stress upon the Christian men reading this article, as they will feel that the potential life partners they may hope to fall in love with, simply are not good enough for no other reason then these women are being themselves.

That is no way to see the world.

We need to keep moving forward, only looking back to see how far we’ve come.

That’s all for this week folks, next week as it is the season of love, we’ll be looking at the history of day of St Valentine.

Until then, ask yourself this; what does your sexuality mean to you?

#BeTheConversation.

If you liked this blog, share with your friends and family. Also don’t forget to check out the back catalogue of entries that we have.

We’d love to know what you think. You can always comment about the topics covered in this entry on the official Facebook Page on the link below.

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Sex Shops

Come one, cum all and see our (under)wares.

Christmas 2015 has come and gone and all of the adverts showcasing the latest children’s toys have faded into obscurity. I remember, as a young’un screaming at the TV screen so much that ‘I want that’ became a catchphrase as annoying to the ear and any from the Catherine Tate show. I always wanted the latest toy, gadget and gizmo that the open market could muster. This faded as my years advanced and now Pokémon cards and Bakugan no longer excite me; I need something more advanced and adult. As we all grow we all seem to forget the joys of toys and it is something that we could easily regain; we just need to be looking in a different kind of catalogue and for a different kind of product. Today is a simple entry to The Open Clinik, looking at where we can rekindle our love of toys in a more adult environment.

Let’s begin.

Kicking off in good old London and starting in the lingerie section, we have Agent Provocateur (http://www.agentprovocateur.com/) on Broadwick Street W1F. Very glamorous and so-called ‘fashion forward’, this little boutique really keeps the underwear that is on for mere moments before being torn off looking classy. Next along the line is Atsuko Kudo (http://www.atsukokudo.com/) on Holloway Road N7. Here we move more to the kink side where all of your latex needs will be met. While not necessarily my thing, some of what they sell could sway my head if my girlfriend rocked up in them. Third is Coco de Mer (http://www.coco-de-mer.com/) on Monmouth Street WC2H. A really good lace, sorry place, that an individual person, couple or group of people, if that’s how you like to spend your time, can go to start developing and exploring the lighter side of kink, bondage and the like. There’s also a 70% off sale at the time of this going up so get there and see where there is for you.

Now, tailoring for the gay man about town with a fetish side is Freak Fetish (http://www.fetishfreak.co.uk/inside.html) on Bolton Crescent SE5. Not for the novice or faint of heart, this store allows those well versed in their particular fetish to really get in deep and ‘down and dirty’. Also, on Oxford Street W1D there’s my personal favourite Harmony (http://www.harmonystore.co.uk/). This place has it all, from the upstairs Star Trek looking luxury devices to the scary as hell massive ‘jungle cocks’ (as branded) downstairs. Always discreet and with great service, I just wish they were paying me to lavish such praise. The final physical shop to mention today is Sh! http://www.sh-womenstore.com/) on Hoxton Square N1. This was left to last, not just due to alphabetical order, but mainly for the reason that it’s by women for women. It is a safe and non-judgemental environment for women to express and explore their sexuality, away from a potentially intimidating and quite judgemental society. They also aid in women who have just come out as a lesbian, in being comfortable with their sexuality and finding a toy to use on any new partners that cum, sorry come, their way (that’s the last awful pun by the way). Sh! is a brilliant place to dip your toes in for your first pleasuring device and for the mentioned reasons it gets the converted ‘The Open Clinik Seal of Approval’.

seal-of-approval-seal

What about those who don’t like the hustle and bustle of the high street and prefer to shop in their bedclothes of choice? Well we have you covered, as here is a good old list of online providers of the latest contraptions that will drive you crazy. Granted the stores previously talked about above have a site on the information super highway, the below list is comprised of ‘online first’ outlets.

http://www.adameve.com/

http://www.bondara.co.uk/

http://www.fetshop.co.uk/index.php?main_page=index

http://www.honour.co.uk/

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/

http://www.nicennaughty.co.uk/

http://www.pabo.com/

http://www.sexshop365.co.uk/

http://www.sextoys.co.uk/

Quite a few there, all with their own exclusive and unique wares to try and entice you in. I’ll hold back from describing each of them and will allow yourself to explore each link to find what gets you excited.

I know that we have looked at stores that cater for gay men and lesbian women and supposed ‘hetero’ shops, but next to all of the outlets mentioned provide goods and services for anyone of any sexuality. Also, to the men out there who are new to all of this, these shops aren’t only for women that want the latest vibrator, as there are so many great products for the male member of society. That is a truth I attest to and am glad to back it up.

Well Reader, I hope this quick shot looking at those who sell toys more suited for adults has sparked an interest. So, next time you need to write your gift list for Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, Winter Solstice or any other holiday around the end of December (and if you don’t observe any celebration around that time that’s cool too), remember the times the younger you simply wanted toys and look to rekindle that feeling, with something more fun then any of the generation one Transformers.

Next week we’ll be doing the first top ten of 2015. Let’s see what the January news has brought us for sex, sexuality and relationships.

Until then, ask yourself this; what does your sexuality mean to you?

We’d love to know what you think.

#BeTheConversation.

If you liked this blog, share with your friends and family. Also don’t forget to check out the back catalogue of entries that we have.

This week we are suggesting Sexuality in the Media.

https://theopenclinik.wordpress.com/2014/06/24/sexuality-and-the-media/

You can always comment about the topics covered in this entry on the official Facebook Page on the link below.

Find more content and ways to connect at the links below.

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Link

Guest Blog: Tinder Yes or No

I still find myself very confused and frustrated with online dating. I discussed the problems of this in a previous post in April last year:  Internet dating or Internet failing (http://obsessedkim-butterflymind.blogspot.co.uk/2014/04/internet-dating-or-internet-failing.html)

More recently I find I am a particularly unsatisfied consumer when it comes to one specific app: Tinder.

Its description in the App Store, is very broad and general ‘Tinder is the fun way to connect with new and interesting people around you’ therefore not labelling itself as a dating app per se. The last line reads ‘it’s a new way to express yourself and share with friends‘ Again very non-committal but,  I don’t remember choosing my ‘friends’ based on how they look.

For anyone who hasn’t seen the delights that Tinder has to offer, you are given pictures of people in your area and swipe left for no and right for yes. If you both like each other then you are matched and can chat on the app. I believe this puts Tinder in the same bracket as dating websites like Plenty Of Fish and Okcupid as they also offer this feature, are free to join and you can message people as much as you like.

Other dating websites like Match.com and Eharmony, require payment to join and promote a more lengthily matching system; whereby the potential for finding long lasting relationships is believed to be greater, as the participants have put a financial investment into their dating life.

All dating websites have different stigmas and reputations. Some say Tinder is the heterosexual version of Grinder – a homosexual dating app especially designed to match people in their immediate location for sexual encounters. Therefore if this belief is true, Tinder would not be the best option for those wanting a relationship.

In my personal experience I have not found Tinder to provide a successful platform to strike up conversations of length. I find the layout of a website with messages promotes more conversation  than a chat stream which is more likely to provide one word responses. Therefore I think subconsciously I have never had the faith in Tinder to preserve long enough to actually meet someone. Yet, friends of mine have not had any trouble with Tinder and have managed to fill whole weekends meeting different guys for actual dates.

I wonder if there is something I am doing wrong. It is pretty binary out there in the Tinder dating world. After the usual, ‘Where are you from?’ ‘What do you do?‘ questions are out the way, the next is usually, ‘What are you here for?’ ‘Do you want some fun?‘  Now I’m not suggesting that all men on tinder are only looking for sex, however from my experience it seems the general view of men in their mid twenties, is that they do not time for a girlfriend,or cannot be bothered with the actual dating game. Are we now so spoilt by the immediacy of internet dating that we are too lazy to even go on a date with a potential match?

One thing I do like about tinder is that it provides a way to be brutal and not apologise for it. If someone only wants sex they will say so and you can decline or accept their offer and there’s no hard feelings. I have always preferred this ‘rip off the plaster’ approach when it comes to dating and Tinder is no exception.  Why waste time? There’s plenty more fish in the sea, and they are all a swipe away… If they can be bothered to swim to you!

Click the link below for the original post.

http://obsessedkim-butterflymind.blogspot.co.uk/2015/01/tinder-yes-or-no.html

Until next time, ask yourself this; what does your sexuality mean to you?

We’d love to know what you think.

#BeTheConversation.

If you liked this blog, share with your friends and family. Also don’t forget to check out the back catalogue of entries that we have.

You can always comment about the topics covered in this entry on the Official Facebook Page on the link below.

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Coming Out

True colours.

As a result of an office move recently with my job, I have now become primarily a home worker. As a part of new found routine and as a reward for a hard day’s graft, I have been getting through a good few episodes of the greatest sitcom ever created.

Cheers (where everybody knows your name and they’re always glad you came).

One of the barmen, Coach, was talking to punter whose son came home from college with his fiancé Rick and the father was finding it difficult to cope with this. By the end of the scene the father knew that he had to accept his son for who he is, as he loved him and didn’t want to lose him from his life. This made me think about those who come out to their loved ones and if we have evolved from 30 years ago when this episode was aired. If a man from the religious haven that is The US of A can accept his gay son, then I’m sure that we have come a long way since then; haven’t we?!

Let’s begin.

It is sadly expected within our society that everyone is straight and can fall into the binary ideology of gender that we have incorrectly established. Anything else is not ‘normal’ (I utterly loathe this word and concept) and needs to be proceeded with an official declaration of this deviation from the expected. People where I work, totally innocently and without judgement or vitriol, will gossip about latest celebrity to come out of the closet.

“Oh my go did you hear that John Smith is gay?”

“What really?!”

“Hell yeah, it’s in the papers!”

“I never would have guessed.”

It’s a sad state of our times that a person’s natural orientation is news worthy. While that is the case, it can be spun and used as positive. Being homosexual, bisexual, transgender, unsure or however you wish to identify comes potential discrimination and degradation, simply as you’re not ‘normal’. Those with social status who come out help to normalise the different points along the spectrum of sexuality and help to dilute the stigma around it. 30 years ago in Cheers this son was brave enough to come out to his dad, but it wasn’t easy then and is not easy now. To come out can out you in danger from those who you love the most.

Friends and family.

We are a social species and naturally develop close bonds with those around us. We will do anything we can to maintain them and try wherever possible to adapt and compromise to ensure that these relationships are not threatened. Yet, it gets to a point where you feel you have to open yourself up to being who you are, even when you are terrified of the consequences. Each person is different, as is every situation. It is vital that you do it in your own time and in your own way, as hopefully then they can see you in your own skin. There are situations where doing so will be incredibly dangerous (think of the fundamentalist/conservative countries around the world where being homosexual is a capital punishment) and you will need to ensure that you are safe to discuss your sexuality with those around you. When in America, I spoke to lovely gentleman who told me that he was kicked out at 14 after coming out to his family and a few years later his father held a loaded handgun to his head, when her returned to the family home to give his 10 year old sister a Christmas present, as to not corrupt her too. His family call themselves ‘church going Christians’.

Hateful.

Shameful.

Inhuman.

Bravery is not the lack of fear; it’s the overcoming of it. The feelings of fear that someone may have when hiding a significant part of themselves is unimaginable, but very much real and a very much a reality. To make advancements and overcoming this primal emotion is, in my opinion, is one of the highest things anyone can do. Possibly losing the bonds of friendship that they have spent years building; possibly losing contact with family; possibly losing their lively hood; possibly losing their lives. The best advice that we can give here at The Open Clinik is that you do what makes you happy, while doing it at your own pace. It is important that you identify those who are the most likely to support and accept you and start from there. Parents don’t have to be the first to be told how you identify sexually, especially if they are anything like the aforementioned weapon wielding ‘C U Next Tuesday’. The comfort and companionship of an understanding friend is a great environment to allow yourself to become accustomed to your new label, which you have assigned to yourself. It’s a badge of honour.

Wear with pride.

enhanced-23459-1416427782-12

Every person that comes out as not heterosexual, is another person indirectly helping the cause of normalising more variations of sexuality. A gay man living his life in the best way possible is a shining beacon. A transgender woman being who she wants to be is a light in the dark for others to follow. Even without being active, you are being an activist. You are showing this world that you are not ‘damaged’, ‘strange’ or ‘unnatural’. That your feelings are as normal theirs’.

That you are you.

I believe that it will take all of us to make this world better for us all and in that way I do believe that people have a social responsibility to be out and proud of whomever they are. While this is my opinion, I am a realist and I know that this is not always possible. As previously mentioned, governments will kill their own citizens for being themselves.

That is where we come in.

We are lucky to be standing on the shoulders of giants. Martin Luther King; Emily Davison; Christopher Hitchens; Ghandi and the list goes on and on. These titanic figures have all been part of the moulding of a society where we can believe, say and within reason do what we like, all without the fear of government oppression.

This is our platform.

This is where we make life better for others.

This is where we all work together.

We can make space for those who have none. We can create safe environments for those who need a shoulder to cry on. We can build a better world. For those who are not able to be themselves, we can tell them that they are part of an ever growing community of like minded people who are ready to hear their story. We never even need to meet or live in the same hemisphere, as with the power of the Internet we can touch millions and be touched ourselves by the plights of individuals. There are so many great organisations out there who give advice, support and aid to those affected with not understanding their sexuality or have been persecuted because of it.

This is the whole point for The Open Clinik.

I wanted to create a place for people to develop their own ideas of their sexuality, normalise the things that people have not heard of, to make people realise how it permeates into the rest of their lives and the lives of those around them. To create a safe haven for people to share who they are and to form a community that is able to inspire and help us progress as a species. Like Cheers, I want to make it a place where you can go, where everybody knows your name and we are always glad you came (giggidy). As I asked at the start, have we developed in the 30 years from the episode of Cheers that inspired this entry? I like to think so, but we have ways to go. I am reassured that more and more progressive people are coming out and helping homosexuals, bisexuals, transgenders etc do the same and I know that this will only continue to grow. Please see below for a list of resources that help those struggling to understand their individual sexuality and also ones to stories (good and bad) about coming out.

http://www.lgf.org.uk/

http://www.outlinesurrey.org/index.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moSFlvxnbgk

http://www.rucomingout.com/

http://www.buzzfeed.com/skarlan/22-of-the-shortest-coming-out-stories-ever-told#.xoJ5O2lov

http://www.queerty.com/five-ways-you-definitely-shouldnt-come-out-20141011

http://whenicameout.com/

http://www.refinery29.com/2014/10/75917/national-coming-out-day-nyc-lesbians#slide

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/oct/11/national-coming-out-day-stories-gay-pride

http://www.queerty.com/16-of-the-best-and-worst-coming-out-stories-from-anonymous-sharing-app-whisper-20140820

So Reader, if any of the points raised today affect you and speak to your situation, I hope that it has helped in any little way possible and that you are able to find solace in the links above. Also, if you know someone struggling with their sexuality, then I hope that you passed this entry to them to let them know the simple truth:

We are all in this together.

They’re not alone.

—-

Until next time, ask yourself this; what does your sexuality mean to you?

 

We’d love to know what you think.

 

#BeTheConversation.

 

If you liked this blog, share with your friends and family. Also don’t forget to check out the back catalogue of entries that we have.

 

You can always comment about the topics covered in this entry on the Official Facebook Page on the link below.

 

Find more content and ways to connect at the links below.

 

Like us on Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/TheOpenClinik

 

Follow us on Twitter:

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Subscribe on YouTube:

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Banned Porn

Ban the bomb, not the bum!!

It is high time to get back into this blog and to get back into what I love doing, writing about sexuality. While we have a few things burning the back ground here at The Open Clinik that are taking time to catch fire so to speak, I felt that recent article in the Independent needed a quick response entry to.

In the UK, we are lucky to live in one of the most secular and progressive counties in the world. We do have our issues and things to iron out, but on a whole, it’s rather ok. Yet on the tenth of this month our regulators took a big step backwards towards a more conservative time. As of that day the below actions/genres of porn are now illegal to film in the British Isles.

• Spanking.
• Caning.
• Aggressive whipping.
• Penetration by any object “associated with violence”.
• Physical or verbal abuse (regardless of if consensual).
• Urolagnia (known as “water sports”).
• Role-playing as non-adults.
• Physical restraint.
• Humiliation.
• Female ejaculation.
• Strangulation.
• Facesitting.
• Fisting.

The last three particularly ruled out by the British Board of Film Censors (BBFC) as ‘life threatening’. So, why have they done this?

Protection.

The BBFC stated that they have put in place these rules to protect us. This, ladies and gentlemen, is total bullshit. This is a simple situation where some people that do not like the idea of porn are forcing their ideas of morality onto reasonable, consenting adults. The BBFC does have in place the R18 certificate for adult films that so far, according to the Department of Culture, Media and Sport, is being very effective in ensuring that porn is only distributed at licensed outlets, thus protecting the most impressionable of our society.

Children.

The discussion on free Internet porn is one for another day.

Apart from the obvious issues with putting certain actors, actress, companies etc out of business, there are many deeper implications with this ruling. First off, the whole decision is incredibly sexist. We can still watch a young woman sitting in a pool and having a group of men ejaculating over her bukkake, but one woman wither her lesbian lover squirting is a BIG, ILLEGAL NO NO!! So, why is it ok for guy and not for gals? No reasoning was ever given by the BBFC. Next on the list of problems is the fact it goes against a certain group.

The LGBT & BDSM communities.

A lot of the banned genres are very popular in these circles and now the BBFC has told them that their personal sexual preferences are not acceptable. Imagine Reader, your favourite sexual act being labelled as disgusting, deplorable and above all, borderline illegal. So many people love being spanked, so many people enjoy water sports, so many people love being tied up. The BBFC has decided that these are not an acceptable part of British society.

But who are they to decide?!

We are all consenting adults, whose sexuality and preferences have been moulded since our childhood and we have the ability to choose. The BBFC has limited our choices of how we are able to express our sexuality and has deemed certain actions as wrong, when the contrary is true.

There is nothing wrong.

For the idea that some are dangerous, nothing is perfectly safe. As long as all parties involved are understanding of how to practice safe sex, be that using condoms or how to correctly sit on our partner’s face, then what is the problem?!

Again, nothing!!

There is so much more that could be talked about on this topic alone, but as this is a quick shot blog entry, I’m going to leave it there. All the extra stuff will be included very soon in their own full entry.

But before I go, spanking?!?! Are you kidding me?! Banned!! Utterly butterly barmy.

Until then, ask yourself; what does your sexuality mean to you?

We’d love to know what you think.

#BeTheConversation.

If you liked this blog, share with your friends and family. Also don’t forget to check out the back catalogue of entries that we have.

This week we are suggesting inter-racial relationships https://theopenclinik.wordpress.com/2014/05/19/interracial-relationships/

You can always comment about the topics covered in this entry on the Official Facebook Page on the link below.

Find more content and ways to connect at the links below.

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Sex in the News – August & September 2014

Like a man having issues with diarrhoea, I need to be more regular. Things seem to keep getting in the way of getting a new entry out on the weekly basis that I planned for initially.

Life.

Who needs it?!

All excuses aside, as we did not get the somewhat traditional end of the month look at the news in sexuality and relationships for both August and September, tonight we are having a TOP TEN COUNTDOWN incorporating both of these surprisingly warm weather filled months.

Some fun, some news; it’s all in this little article.

Let’s begin.

10)

We have Black History Month, we have Ramadan, we even have ‘I’m a celebrity get me out of here’. While these long running celebrations are all important in their own way, there is one that tops the lot.

Anal August.

That’s right; August is the month where we are encouraged to embrace all things to do with bum sex. If you have not heard this great fact then I do implore you to put it in your 2015 calendars, to remind you to give something new a go. As my colleagues say on the matter, back it up!! http://www.makesexeasy.com/august-anal-sex-month/

9)

Here we have an entry from September on a more sombre note and unfortunately not the only one we will see of tonight. Here is a report on old Capital FM DJ Dr Fox being arrested to be questioned on possible sexual assaults. While nothing concrete has been found, it is always so saddening when anyone who is ever seen in a good light like he was enthralled in something as terrible as this. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-29431833

8)

Jumping back to August now and on the same vein as above, this time it’s jolly old self proclaimed asexual Cliff Richard being investigated on an alleged sex offense in 1985. His had his house raided and search, but at this time no arrested have been made. As with Dr Fox, I truly hope that this is a simple misunderstanding and no one was hurt. Fingers crossed. I promise number seven will be more upbeat. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-28790718

7)

Dropping to September now we have to chat about something that many, many people over hear would not have heard of and that is a show that was put on by the Sydney Evolver Spore. This exhibition was looking at ‘the feminine’ and was celebrating it. While this obviously did not grab many world wide eyes, I wanted to include it as any time people celebrate sex, sexuality and relationships in a healthy, respectful and fun manor, I’m all for it and will champion it to the last day. http://www.evolvernetwork.org/2014/09/01/evolver-sydney-shaking-off-and-celebrating-feminine-shadow-in-sexuality-august-21-2014/

6)

We have Valentines Day, we have Stake and Blowjob day, we even have Christmas. While these long running celebrations are all important in their own way, there is one that tops the lot (Actually not Christmas. Nothing tops that).

Bisexuality day.

On 23/09/2014 we celebrate those who identify as bisexual in all of their gender hopping glory. As with Anal August, I hope that you put this into you 2015 diary and again look to try something or someone new. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Celebrate_Bisexuality_Day

5)

Sticking with September again, we have a report of a Stanford Scholar doing some exciting and fascinating research on ‘the closet’ that many gay people find themselves in at some point in their lives and the blurring of sex boundaries across Europe and America. In a nutshell he has found that we have become more accepting as a society of people who don’t fit within the unrealistic and possibly damaging boxes that we try to force them into, but also was under no illusions that we still have ways to go. I’m going to keep a close eye on this gentleman and will be posting many more things in the coming times. http://news.stanford.edu/news/2014/september/robinson-gay-history-091814.html

4)

We have a few in August to get through now, so lets talk about a man with that name and the predicament that his dick has placed him in. A young lady that this signer slept with has decided to sue him, as his penis was too big for her to take. She went on to claim that it caused her legs to start shaking and that ‘it burst her cervix’, which I looked up and found that this would be rather fatal if left untreated. I will put it to you Reader, does a man with a very above average penis have a responsibility to treat his member like a loaded weapon, or is this girl talking out the other hole? http://ksfm.cbslocal.com/2014/07/09/woman-suing-august-alsina-for-injuring-her-during-sex-see-how/

3)

Hitting the top three is the Lib Dem campaign to have sexual education begin around the age of 7. Here at The Open Clinik we believe that this is a vital piece of the curriculum that is severely lacking and it has been covered in the first article, which you can read here: https://theopenclinik.wordpress.com/2014/05/11/dad-where-do-babies-come-from-go-ask-your-mother/comment-page-1/#comment-5

I know recently that there has been some stirring recently about ‘sex at 13 being normal’ and the whole ‘scandal’ around that, but this will be covered in the next top ten. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-28934047

2)

Now we get to the most disturbing entry into this top ten. The Rotherham sex scandal has rocked the educational system and the social care system alike. There was so much that went wrong with so many different organisations and governing bodies that it both boggles the mind and breaks the heart. Over 1,400 children raped over a 15-year period and no one seemed to do anything to stop it. At some point this will warrant its own full article, but will have to be after the dust has fully settled and the rage has dissipated from my heart to allow for an objective look, rather than an ager filled rant. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-south-yorkshire-28939089

1)

While number 2 in itself would warrant top stop, I don’t like to end on a sad note and like Russell Howard’s Good News would remind us, it’s not all doom and gloom. To Emma Watson goes the spoils. Her speech looking at fighting the obvious global disparity between men and women was one of heart felt words and inspirational messages. The term feminism is seen in a negative light in our society and the stereotype angry man hater seems to play in our mind’s eye. Yet, she was able to not only make the term less about this, but allowed for people to be able to proudly call themselves such. I, Bil Murrill, am a feminist. If you believe in the simple truth that men and women are equal, then you too have the honour of calling yourself a feminist. Take it, embrace it, let’s take the term and wear it close to our hearts as proudly as we wear our poppies upon the same place. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gkjW9PZBRfk

Oh yeah and some naked pictures got leaked or something. Boring.

 

Next time we will have a look at some terrible hook up stories from uni. If you have one that you wish to contribute under complete anonymity then drop a message and we will look to include.

Until then, ask yourself; what does your sexuality mean to you?

We’d love to know what you think.

#BeTheConversation.

If you liked this blog, share with your friends and family. Also don’t forget to check out the back catalogue of entries that we have.

This week we are suggesting our first blog on current sexuality and relationships education https://theopenclinik.wordpress.com/2014/05/11/dad-where-do-babies-come-from-go-ask-your-mother/comment-page-1/#comment-5

You can always comment about the topics covered in this entry on the Official Facebook Page on the link below.

Find more content and ways to connect at the links below.

Like us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheOpenClinik

Follow us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheOpenClinik

Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheOpenClinik [Videos will be coming soon. Watch this space]

 

The Return

It’s been a while.

There’s been a lot of life in the past few weeks that has gotten in the way of my writing of new entries. Thankfully that hectic time has now passed and it is time to get back on that proverbial horse and to ensure that we stay as a good canter; THREE NEW BLOGS will be coming out this week.

Craziness!!

We will have some words of encouragement for those who are looking for love or a simple lay; a top 10 countdown of stories from August & September and as University is back in session, a selection of hook up stories from the walls of the halls.

Following on from the latter, next week we will have a dive into the possible sex lives of our favourite fictional characters. The week after that a dissection of hook up culture within universities and then move on to the age old question of can men and women being just friends.

That’s a lot of work to get out in time so I better get on with it.

Let’s begin.

To get the old writing juices flowing I decided that I would commit plain and simple plagiarism. So below is a summary of advice given on a podcast that I frequent on two simple topics:

  1. Finding love.
  2. Getting laid.

Now, I did try to link each nugget of wisdom to its owner, but searching a lot of these sites turned out to be rather fruitless. So, to save time I shall link to the specific episode at the bottom of this entry. I highly recommend Reader, that you take 37 minutes and 52 seconds to really get the full picture and context of each sex educator’s words as they are heart felt and the overall tone of the podcast is heart warming. Some of the advice may seem a bit clichéd and in points basic, but as my Sunday League manager keeps telling us, ‘do the basics right and the rest will follow’. Such a wise man.

Finding love.

  • You have the right to create the relationship that fits you best.
  • Finding compatibility is the number one thing to focus on.
  • If you can’t find people, find the place where like-minded people hang out and then be aggressively yourself.
  • Don’t be afraid to filter people in and out of your life.
  • Don’t set expectations too high. Be open to the unexpected.
  • Love yourself first. Take yourself on a date. Spend a night masturbating and getting to know your body.
  • You should always be yourself. Never underestimate yourself. When you don’t think you are being yourself, you are!
  • Make sure you reflect seriously on how you are with yourself, as this relationship is the one that you need to ensure is the healthiest. This is attractive!
  • One must learn themselves through experiencing your life. Get out in the world.
  • Fall in love with yourself. Love for others will then come from a strong, healthy place.
  • If you are disabled, it is ok to ask your primary care giver to assist in helping being intimate. Sex is an internal need and something that you deserve as much as any other human being.

 Getting laid.

  • Be interested, not interesting. Take the focus to the other person. TIP when talking to the person; make sure that you are paying attention to their eye colour.
  • Find people that you know, who have your values around sex.
  • Getting confident and making people feeling comfortable.
  • Getting comfortable with rejection. You can either waste energy wishing or turn that into seeking people actively.
  • Make a list of everything that you have done that day to show you have done well and to give yourself a pat on the back. This should also help with stress as you have transferred your worries to paper from your mind.
  • Make sure you’re ‘full’. Neediness is easy to spot and people are going to run.
  • Get to know the person and let them to discover you. Don’t try to impress too much, as this can take away the magic of exploration for the other person and can come across as needy.
  • Care and feeding manual. Three categories – triggers – boundaries – skills (I’ll let the specific educator explain this one more when you listen to the podcast).
  • Smiling, deep breathing and laughter get you laid.
  • Make a lot of noise when playing with yourself.
  • Understand why you want to get laid or want to be in a relationship. Understand what you’re looking for and why.

http://www.nerdist.com/pepisode/sex-nerd-sandra-158-sex-geek-bus/

It feels good to be back tapping away at this keyboard.

Anyway, thank you for reading and I hope to see you next time (in the next day or two) as we will be counting down the top ten stories and news articles in sex and sexuality in August and September.

Until then, ask yourself; what does your sexuality mean to you?

We’d love to know what you think.

#BeTheConversation.

If you liked this blog, share with your friends and family. Also don’t forget to check out the back catalogue of entries that we have.

This week we are suggesting ‘Slut Shaming’ https://theopenclinik.wordpress.com/2014/06/17/slut-shaming/

You can always comment about the topics covered in this entry on the Official Facebook Page on the link below.

Find more content and ways to connect at the links below.

Like us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheOpenClinik

Follow us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheOpenClinik

Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheOpenClinik

[Videos will be coming soon. Watch this space]